Fic: Poetry's for dorks, G

[stinglikeabee]

Title: Poetry's For Dorks
Claim: General DCU
Characters/Pairing: Impulse, Secret, Robin, Superboy
Rating: Gimme a G!
Word Count: 750
Prompt: Limerick (T15, P56)
Summary: Secret finds a book of poetry.
Disclaimer: DC owns my soul the characters
Author's Notes/Warnings: I really, really miss YJ.  So I thought I'd write this little fic. In case you don't know which limerick I'm referring to, it's the obscene one here. No actual swears in the fic, though :D

Bart found her in the library, seated in a big cushy armchair with a dusty book in her hands. Being the inquisitive sort, he zipped up to see what she was up to.

'Whatcha readin', Secret?'

'It's a book of poetry,' she said, raising the text to his eye level. 'See?'

Bart scanned through the pages in seconds. 'What's a prithee?'

She slipped a Wendy the Werewolf Slayer bookmark between the pages and shut the book. 'I don't know. A lot of the poems in here have got weird words like ducat and covetous.'

'Ducat and cov... cov... covechoose?'

'Exactly!'

Bart tapped his left foot, head cocked to the side. 'I bet Robin would know.'

'Oh!' Secret's cheeks colored. 'Do you think he writes poetry?'

'What?'

She shook her head, blond hair obscuring her features. 'Nothing.'

'C'mon.' Without waiting for an answer, Bart grabbed Secret and down at the den they both reappeared. 'Hi guys!'

Robin didn't look up from the table, but Superboy grunted in between flipping through television channels.

Secret glanced timidly at Bart. 'He looks busy,' she whispered.

'I'm sure he has time for you,' Bart stage-whispered back, leading Robin to exhale loudly.

'Can I help you two?'

They approached him, Bart arriving first and flipping through several textbooks on the table. 'Ew, that's what an inside-out frog looks like?'

Robin shut the book on Bart's hand. Then he turned to Secret. 'Yes?'

She looked everywhere but at him. 'Um. See, I..'

'Prithee!'

Robin swivelled to acknowledge Bart's outburst. 'Excuse me?'

In response, Bart swiped the book from Secret's hands and shoved it in Robin's face. 'It's in here. Prithee. Look.'

Calmly, Robin opened to the bookmarked page. 'I see,' he said, after a while. 'You're referring to poetry.'

A large snort was heard from the direction of the sofa. 'Poetry's for dorks.'

'NO IT'S NOT!'

Bart and Robin stared at Secret. She blushed. 'Well, it's not. It's beautiful and romantic, even if I don't understand any of it.'

'Please.' Superboy rested his chin on the top of sofa and rolled his eyes. 'All that stars in your eyes corny crap. Lame-a-ola.'

Secret threw him a dirty look.

'Will someone please tell me what prithee means?'

'Prithee, an archaic contraction of 'I pray thee'.'

Bart's eyebrows shot up. 'Archaic? Contraction?'

'Give it up, Robbie. Bart's never going to get it.'

Now both Secret and Bart were glaring daggers at Superboy.

'It's an old fashioned word for saying please.' Robin handed the book back to Secret. 'The Romantics, like in this collection, wrote about intense emotions in their poetry, particularly love.'

'Oh,' said Secret bashfully, hugging the volume to her chest. 'Do you like poetry?'

He shrugged. 'It's okay.'

'I don't think they had poetry in the future,' burst in Bart, oblivious to Secret's look of annoyance.

'Smart,' said Superboy. 'Who has the time to read some dead person's mushy feelings?' He gestured for Bart to come closer. 'You know, the good stuff isn't in moldy old books.'

'Oh yeah?' said Bart, warily moving closer. 'What good stuff?'

'Limericks.' Superboy grinned. 'Dirty limericks.'

Robin groaned. 'Kon, don't.'

'What?' Bart glanced between the two. 'Tell me.'

'Dirty?' said Secret, forgetting she was mad at Superboy.

'There once was a man from Nantucket--'

'No.' Robin crossed his arms.

'Whose di-'

'KON!'

'Okay, fine. What about this one? There once was a man named Mick--'

'KONNNNNNNNNN!'

He pouted. 'Look, we're all adults here.' At Robin's incredulous glare, he backtracked. 'What? You can't protect them forever, Robbie.'

'Yeah, Robbie,' chimed in Bart, mutinously.

'Ugh. You do what you want. I'm getting back to my homework.' He sat back down, and picked up a pen.

'Psst.'

Bart leaned in.

'Hand me a piece of paper and a pen.' Superboy then scribbled a few lines. 'Here ya go.'

Secret and Bart gathered round and read. Secret was first to respond, with a very large gasp, then a long 'EWWWWWWWWWW.' Robin glanced up in surprise, and immediately cast a dark look at a grinning Superboy.

Bart, however, remained in silent contemplation until he opened his mouth to ask, 'What's a cu--'

'KON!'

Comments

[shananagin.livejournal.com]

I love limericks. It's why I wrote all those fannish ones a while back.

Awesome! Greta would totally like poetry and be all romantic, and I loved Bart and everything.

[stinglikeabee.livejournal.com]

Hee, I love limericks too. But I wussed out and couldn't think of anything appropriately smutty for one. Thanks for commenting!

Could I read the fannish limericks you've written? :D

[shananagin.livejournal.com]

But of course! They vary from fairly innocent to highly dirty with Dick puns.

Here.

[fractalmelody.livejournal.com]

Bwahaha, Nantucket. The capital city of dirty limericks! :D

[stinglikeabee.livejournal.com]

Hee hee! So many dirty words rhyming with Nantucket, so little time :D

[amarin-rose.livejournal.com]

Cute. :) Oh, Kon, you aren't an adult; Robin's the only one who is. And Snapper. And Anita. And Slobo. And Ray.

But not you. :P

[stinglikeabee.livejournal.com]

HAHA! How very true. That line never worked on Knockout either :D

Thanks for reading!

[beef-wonder3.livejournal.com]

That was adorable!
Kon is a wicked, wicked boy.
Great work!

[stinglikeabee.livejournal.com]

Yay, thank you!

[saavikam77.livejournal.com]

*echoes Tim's sentiments* O_O Bad Kon!

But... he's right, of course. You can't protect them forever. :p

[stinglikeabee.livejournal.com]

Hee hee, Tim's such a mom here. I wonder if that would make Kon the dad?

Thanks for commenting!